Thursday, November 03, 2005

HOOKER-HOOKER!

After several months of delivering pizzas there aren't too many areas in our store's territory where I still get confused, with a couple of notable exceptions. I drove into a new, "uncharted" subdivision last night. All the streets are very similar in name, many of the houses don't have street numbers yet and quite honestly, most of the houses look alike. I made my way to the back of the subdivision, where the store computer had indicated my delivery should be. As I turned down the street, there was a group of about 10 people, seated in lawn chairs and holding drinks, in the front of one of the houses. Closer to the road, a group of 7 and under-year olds played some type yard game. They stopped long enough to all yell a staccato, "PIZZA-PIZZA" at the whitish chevy, as I drove buy. Now, this pizza-pizza thing has become a cultural phenomenon in the younger set, due to some competitor's past advertising campaign. In that light, I hardly ever drive past a group of kids without at least one of them yelling those words. In any case, as I rolled past, I watched the kids carefully so that one didn't dart in front of my whitish car. I waved and drove on to my appointed round, I thought. I kept looking for an address and proceeded until I came upon yet another group of people and kids in their front yard......It was the same group and I had gone in a big circle. Once again, as I passed, "PIZZA- PIZZA". I waved and searched on. A minute or so later and there I was again, "PIZZA- PIZZA". Now the adults started to get into the act, as I drove past. I stopped waving and started to sink lower in my seat, on my fifth trip. This time, I drove around the bend, out of their sight line and tried to call the customer on my cell phone...no answer. I proceeded very slowly ahead, hoping that someone will show mercy, step out of their house and stop me before I have to go by again. No luck! After passing again, much to the crowd's delight, I started plotting ways to skulk out of the subdivision before I'd have to orbit again. Miracle of miracles, a guy stepped out his house and flagged me down. I am still not convinced that he actually ordered the pizza but he had money and looked hungry. I gave him the food and left in triumph, my audience now standing and cheering as I exited, stage left.
Later last night, I was in a much different part of town but was again looking for a hidden address on a series of circular streets. I turned off the main road and on to a side street. As I did so, I saw a woman standing in the middle of the road, looking at me. She seemed so happy to see me. I slowed, as I passed, to ask her if she was OK, when I realized she was working. I drove slowly past and just like the kids, she smiled and waved. Now, for the second time in the evening, I was lost on a series of circular streets, with similar looking houses but the numbers had been torn down here and once more, I drove around, again...and again...and again. With each passing visit, the woman seemed less friendly and more annoyed with my headlights and glowing car topper. On my 6th and final pass, I reached my customer by cell phone. They gave me exact directions to their house and I dropped off the pie. As I exited the area, I drove by the woman, one last time, slowly so she couldn't dart in front of my car. I passed, she glared. In the rear view mirror I could see she was yelling at me. I am not sure but fairly certain that it wasn't "PIZZA-PIZZA"!

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